By Shy “Stir” Noonoo, legal correspondent
A new proposal by the Texas Bar Association is expected to increase the rate of convictions in criminal trials there. Prosecution lawyers will be allowed heretofore-prohibited techniques while examining “hostile” witnesses. The proposal defines “hostile witness” as one not giving the desired answers to prosecution questions under oath.
Among the techniques to be allowed: leaning over the witness stand while chewing garlic. This simple action tends to cause witnesses to hold their breath, turn red in the face, and avoid looking directly at the attorney, making them look like they have something to hide.
Another technique: prefacing questions with “Supposing you were to tell the truth here, would you say …?”
Another: board watering (not to be confused with water boarding.) In board watering, the witness takes the stand after a cup of water has been poured onto the seat of the chair. The anxiety about standing up in public with wet pants tends to keep the answers longer and more “helpful” as the witness stalls, hoping his pants will dry. Usually they don’t.
Good prosecutor/bad prosecutor. While one state’s attorney bounces off the walls, shouting and threatening the witness, another tells the witness that he knows the witness wants to help and that the sooner he helps, the sooner this will all be over.
Asked if these techniques wouldn’t amount to torture and violate the constitutional and legal rights of witnesses, Vice-president Cheney saw no problem with them. In a radio interview, Cheney agreed that subjecting witnesses to “a dunk in water” is a “no-brainer” if it could get answers. He said that such interrogations have been a “very important tool” used against high-level al Qaeda detainees such as Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, and that they do not, in his view, constitute torture.
Well, there you are. Techniques the police have been using for years are finally to be seen in a public trial. Why not? The law rests on precedent and what has more precedent than enhanced interrogation. I saw those old James Cagney movies.
One Comment
I am for the enhanced techniques if they could have gotten “Scooter” to roll over on his boss. Of course we all know that the underlings in the Bush Administration do these bad things entirely without direction. Unless of course, the bad things turn into good things then Bush or Cheney are allowed to take credit for them.
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